my boob and armpit are a lovely shade of plum, dashed with a glob of green envy. the title says it all. i crashed our motorbike, and i didn't even want to. this act was in no way premeditated for your sympathy. throw out your kleenex and raise up your sandpaper (and not the fine grade). this is kon tum, vietnam.
our intention for the day was to rent a motorbike, go and see all the "authentic" and "unspoilt" villages of vietnam and return to a meal of vegetarian pho and a saigon or three. ellen and i arose from our slumber at 7pm, only to find all of the hostel's bikes had been rented. grumbling followed on our end and our hostel's manager, quick to rectify the situation as i had complemented her recent pedicure yelled into a phone for about 20 seconds. five minutes later, a man appeared with a bike, presented us with the keys and two helmets, making eye contact only to say "5pm." we correctly assumed that this was the hour that the motorbike was to return to it's owner. probably then end of his shift at work.
ellen had trained on motorbike under the tutelage of yoven, a friend we made in da lat. she was to ride us to the villages, where it would be safer for me to experiment on the petrol-fueled vehicle. for those of you who don't know me...i don't have a driver's license. rather, i ride bikes to save your environment people!!
our first stop was actually a pastel colored church with the usual ave maria hanging around. a little nervous, i agreed to take the motorbike around the parking lot in a complete circle. success was mine and i was feeling pretty good. i was still a little jerky on the gas, but it was a clean circle and nothing was damaged...yet.
we must have passed through 3-4 villages, making friends only with those under the age of 7 as we passed. took some shots of the kids, made them laugh, all that good stuff. then ellen climbed down from the bike and asked if i was ready. since the parking lot pre-run had gone so swimmingly, i figured, what the hay...there were no people or livestock on the rode, so they only thing i could hurt was MYSELF, which i promptly did.
lunging forward, things were going quite nicely. i stopped a comfortable distance away from ellen and tried to turn the bike around. a temporary dose of la-la-land made me forget that this was not a bicycle and gripping the handle bar, aka the GAS in a certain manner would make the bike move forward. halfway through the turn i crashed through larger-than-gillian branches and plummeted down a small slope into someones field. i officially maimed my sandals and a toe...all other pieces were in check, although some sore and slightly discolored. the familiar "i'm okay, i'm okay," hung in the air as several villagers, whom i presume owned the field rushed over to help.
i had beat the reaper once more! my smile quickly faded once ellen pointed out the keys were no longer in the ignition. minus shoes; myself, ellen and the villagers frantically tossed foliage and the damaged branches aside looking for the keys. i was in a bit of a panic. we were very far from our hostel and well, we were very far from our hostel. and i had no shoes.
one of the villagers dashed off to their abode, only to return with a key in hand. it fit into the ignition...and it fit into the hole to access the gas...pure luck. we thank youed and kam oned our way back onto the bike; with ellen in the front and continued on our way.
a little shaken by the incident, we stopped for some sugar cane juice and i stuffed my bra with ice. one foreigner with yellow hair and one without shoes attracted a lot of attention...definitely unwanted, and we hopped back on our knight to explore further.
the highlight of the day had to be discovering a school house, under which children apparently on their lunch break were milling about. already turning a healthy rock lobster red, we snuck under the school for shelter. the curious little ones shrieked in excitement and i quickly shifted into english teacher mode and did my normal routine with the kids. we sang, we danced, we piled upon one another, that is until their teacher returned looking a bit unsure. we quickly made our exit and returned to the road, our new home.
riding along the waterfront, ellen let me man the bike once more. i did a clean line forwards and backwards, and that was enough for me...for now. and my mother would be happy to know, the whole time i was wearing my helmet, which was appropriately decorated with a decal on the back that said, "enjoy your life." even with a purple boob, i definitely am doing just that.
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