although we have returned from our three day camel trek several cities ago, it is my duty to my mother to keep her updated, so here i go. what seemed like three pretty good days seemed like the pinnacle of my existence once i detailed our trip to our new found friend branden, who hails from dc. im sure i've driven up their business; which i guess is a good thing because i hold the camel drivers very near and dear to my heart.
setting: the thar desert, aka the younger sibling of the sahara. both are beautiful, cruel and unforgiving. at approximately 7:30 am, susanna, ellen and i crammed into the back of a jeep with our camel crew, which comprised of sylvia (from queens via columbia), tavis (from delhi via maryland), duncan (from bristol), dawn (from hong kong) and yoko (from shanghai via japan). ellen was chosen to be our "ambassador," which is our no-longer secret code for taking people under our wings, or basically forcing them to be our friends and love us forever. while she wasn't entirely satisfied with her role, i think she did a damn fine job, as all of the contact information given to us thus far has been legit...or so we think.
day one: light camel riding. there was lunch cooked under the shade of what i consider to be "a circle of life tree" and pleasantries exchanged as we all became friends. ellen, being a natural born leader was given the largest camel (mr. lalu) to ride. whilst susanna tried to help her get on, something went slightly wrong because in what could've been a live-action opening to the flintstones, ellen fell off. the camel was sitting as she kind of slid head first down it's neck before bobbing a bit and landing face first in the sand. it all happened in very slow motion, it was kind of surreal. but she got up, dusted off her khakis and tried to tame the beast somewhat more successfully. we stopped at what i think were two "villages," but we all felt awkward staring at the inhabitants and basically kicking sand or looking at more cows. after setting up camp at the base of some serious dunes, we all gathered around a campfire to engage in a sing-off against our leaders. they obliterated us as everything sung in hindi automatically wins because we can't really understand it, which only heightens its magical potential. our giant "mineral water" bottle and several pans served as instruments and we forced our comrades to wail madonna far into the night. we were additionally blessed with a full moon. in keeping up with my obsession with "bathroom culture," the desert became my powder room! aided by the moonlight, i was free to relieve myself anywhere without concerning myself with getting lost, stepping on a camel, or straying into a wild dog brawl (see night 2).
day two: sadly, three members of our party departed, as they had only signed up for the one day one night option that we didnt know existed. we said our goodbyes and promised to meet again as we watched them head back with our youngest camel driver, whom i affectionately call little korea. he had met his current korean girlfriend on a previous camel trek and refused to believe that dawn and yoko couldn't speak korean. thus, a lot of conversations ended with yoko screaming, "im japanese!" after the first lalu incident, the camel drivers decided that i (the shortest member of any crew that doesnt contain people under the age of 10) should ride the lalu. this resulted in me having to be heaved atop the horny beast every time we stopped. i forgot to mention that most of the camels were in heat. thus, every time they sensed a female about 10-15 km away, they started foaming at the mouth. this was also accompanied by the sound of blowing bubbles in chocolate milk in stereo as blew air into their tongues that also drooped out the side of their mouths. it was a mess. there was camel hormone foam all over my shoes and jacket, thanks to my transfer to the lalu, the horniest of them all.
day two was a bit of a disaster once the drivers decided the camels should run. after about 30 minutes, we all complained of severe thigh aches and took turn walking our camels. we stopped in another two villages, the second reminding me a bit of the amish horror films that are shown on tv late at night. we were greeted by a couple of girls. one had drawn random symbols on her face with marker and was fond of flipping up her eyelids and growling at us. her smaller companion donned a filthy trucker hat, which she lifted to reveal a head full of fleas? lice? i cant be too sure. she kept trying to remove the insects from her hair and toss them into ours. i decided to slip away from the crowd, my hygienic safety at risk. unsuccessfully, i was approached by a little pint sized boy who aggressively tried to trade his ball (which appeared to be a paintball that never exploded) for my eyeglasses. in an effort to keep him at bay, i decided to engage in a game of catch with him. by this time, flippy eyelids had sauntered over, obviously upset about the lack of attention being paid to her. grabbing the ball, she pegged me hardcore in the leg, leaving me with a sweet black and blue. abandoning the operation all together, i tried to see how yoko was doing. she was trying to get a shot of a small puppy, but every time she was about to click the shutter, a demon child would pop a body part into the frame. flippy spit at her and susanna. defeated, we trekked back towards the drivers, begging them to take us away from this place.
the winds were strong as we settled down to camp. there was the usually wonderful meal of chapatti, chai and some vegetable mush that was utterly delectable. upon discovering the i had my italk in my bag, we managed to record some of the camel drivers songs on yoko's ipod. their eyes glistened as they got to listen to the playback of their voices, and kamal started tearing a bit. we promised to make them a cd and send them some of our old discmans as soon as we returned to our countries of origin. settling down under a full moon once again, we were awoken in the middle of the night by sounds of barking and pissing. it seems (my head was hidden far under the blankets) that a pack of wild dogs were fighting over the remains of our dinner right next to our heads. it was insane. i was a little freaked, as i didnt have my neosporin in case of a large fight. 15 minutes into the massacre, one of the camel drivers awoke to shoo them away, and the rest of the night was quite pleasant.
day three: heading back to the jeeps. i was a little sad to leave mr. khan and kamal in the desert, as they had become my pals. they taught me how to clean plates in the desert (using sand!), pack up a camel, make them run and sit, it was pretty crazy. but they had a new group to meet and i had some serious showering to attend to. upon our return, we were greeted by our little family at the hotel jeet...it was sweet. and it rhymes...and i have to go write an email to my man, so that's all for now.
setting: the thar desert, aka the younger sibling of the sahara. both are beautiful, cruel and unforgiving. at approximately 7:30 am, susanna, ellen and i crammed into the back of a jeep with our camel crew, which comprised of sylvia (from queens via columbia), tavis (from delhi via maryland), duncan (from bristol), dawn (from hong kong) and yoko (from shanghai via japan). ellen was chosen to be our "ambassador," which is our no-longer secret code for taking people under our wings, or basically forcing them to be our friends and love us forever. while she wasn't entirely satisfied with her role, i think she did a damn fine job, as all of the contact information given to us thus far has been legit...or so we think.
day one: light camel riding. there was lunch cooked under the shade of what i consider to be "a circle of life tree" and pleasantries exchanged as we all became friends. ellen, being a natural born leader was given the largest camel (mr. lalu) to ride. whilst susanna tried to help her get on, something went slightly wrong because in what could've been a live-action opening to the flintstones, ellen fell off. the camel was sitting as she kind of slid head first down it's neck before bobbing a bit and landing face first in the sand. it all happened in very slow motion, it was kind of surreal. but she got up, dusted off her khakis and tried to tame the beast somewhat more successfully. we stopped at what i think were two "villages," but we all felt awkward staring at the inhabitants and basically kicking sand or looking at more cows. after setting up camp at the base of some serious dunes, we all gathered around a campfire to engage in a sing-off against our leaders. they obliterated us as everything sung in hindi automatically wins because we can't really understand it, which only heightens its magical potential. our giant "mineral water" bottle and several pans served as instruments and we forced our comrades to wail madonna far into the night. we were additionally blessed with a full moon. in keeping up with my obsession with "bathroom culture," the desert became my powder room! aided by the moonlight, i was free to relieve myself anywhere without concerning myself with getting lost, stepping on a camel, or straying into a wild dog brawl (see night 2).
day two: sadly, three members of our party departed, as they had only signed up for the one day one night option that we didnt know existed. we said our goodbyes and promised to meet again as we watched them head back with our youngest camel driver, whom i affectionately call little korea. he had met his current korean girlfriend on a previous camel trek and refused to believe that dawn and yoko couldn't speak korean. thus, a lot of conversations ended with yoko screaming, "im japanese!" after the first lalu incident, the camel drivers decided that i (the shortest member of any crew that doesnt contain people under the age of 10) should ride the lalu. this resulted in me having to be heaved atop the horny beast every time we stopped. i forgot to mention that most of the camels were in heat. thus, every time they sensed a female about 10-15 km away, they started foaming at the mouth. this was also accompanied by the sound of blowing bubbles in chocolate milk in stereo as blew air into their tongues that also drooped out the side of their mouths. it was a mess. there was camel hormone foam all over my shoes and jacket, thanks to my transfer to the lalu, the horniest of them all.
day two was a bit of a disaster once the drivers decided the camels should run. after about 30 minutes, we all complained of severe thigh aches and took turn walking our camels. we stopped in another two villages, the second reminding me a bit of the amish horror films that are shown on tv late at night. we were greeted by a couple of girls. one had drawn random symbols on her face with marker and was fond of flipping up her eyelids and growling at us. her smaller companion donned a filthy trucker hat, which she lifted to reveal a head full of fleas? lice? i cant be too sure. she kept trying to remove the insects from her hair and toss them into ours. i decided to slip away from the crowd, my hygienic safety at risk. unsuccessfully, i was approached by a little pint sized boy who aggressively tried to trade his ball (which appeared to be a paintball that never exploded) for my eyeglasses. in an effort to keep him at bay, i decided to engage in a game of catch with him. by this time, flippy eyelids had sauntered over, obviously upset about the lack of attention being paid to her. grabbing the ball, she pegged me hardcore in the leg, leaving me with a sweet black and blue. abandoning the operation all together, i tried to see how yoko was doing. she was trying to get a shot of a small puppy, but every time she was about to click the shutter, a demon child would pop a body part into the frame. flippy spit at her and susanna. defeated, we trekked back towards the drivers, begging them to take us away from this place.
the winds were strong as we settled down to camp. there was the usually wonderful meal of chapatti, chai and some vegetable mush that was utterly delectable. upon discovering the i had my italk in my bag, we managed to record some of the camel drivers songs on yoko's ipod. their eyes glistened as they got to listen to the playback of their voices, and kamal started tearing a bit. we promised to make them a cd and send them some of our old discmans as soon as we returned to our countries of origin. settling down under a full moon once again, we were awoken in the middle of the night by sounds of barking and pissing. it seems (my head was hidden far under the blankets) that a pack of wild dogs were fighting over the remains of our dinner right next to our heads. it was insane. i was a little freaked, as i didnt have my neosporin in case of a large fight. 15 minutes into the massacre, one of the camel drivers awoke to shoo them away, and the rest of the night was quite pleasant.
day three: heading back to the jeeps. i was a little sad to leave mr. khan and kamal in the desert, as they had become my pals. they taught me how to clean plates in the desert (using sand!), pack up a camel, make them run and sit, it was pretty crazy. but they had a new group to meet and i had some serious showering to attend to. upon our return, we were greeted by our little family at the hotel jeet...it was sweet. and it rhymes...and i have to go write an email to my man, so that's all for now.
You are totally crazy!!!! Love you. Mom
ReplyDeletewant to be there!
ReplyDeletecamels are awesome. I rode one in Australia - actually my friend and I rode the same one at the same time. lucky you with your own camels!
can't wait to hear more